Tag: Cade FON Apollyon – The Unseen Synchro

Pimple Prick Eruption: A Roob/Click Convo Fragment

*/Dons PPE… Ready then, Clicky, play the vid…*

*Captain Cook’s Sandwich Islands? …/lights up… I’m Kveen of Sammiches, Clicky… /drags… Hey, didn’t you send some Bubbles in Hugo’s direction earlier today? …/streams smoke…*

Masterful Thumbs Up

*/taps teeth… Cade started his post yesterday with a rather large bubble, Click …/deep drag…*

Sweet Master

*/blows smoke ring… Yeah, he teally is a sweetie, Clicky… *

*Yikes! …/flicks ash…*

‘In other words, what’s happened over the last eight days was just “cleaning out the pipes” so to speak.’

*/final drag… She’s a right Nuclear Wintour… /snorts smoke… Didn’t Trinny work for her? …/stubs butt…*

 

Missive From ‘Merica: Tick Arty Boo-Hoo!

https://youtu.be/M3MvJEIZKPk

Well hello there, Dear Reader…

😀

I don’t know about you, but I’ve been having a great week, with a bank holiday day off, gorgeous weather to set the mood lighting and only Friday to go…

And now, from across the Pond, the missive you’ve been missing, from the Okie Devil himself…

*He certainly gets me thinking, Clicky… /lights up…*

*******

What effect does capillary action have on the epidermis?

What effect does blood pressure have on the epidermis?
^Roxy Music – More Than This^

My Austin trip has been canceled. I guess that’ll leave me more time for writing…eh?

^i_o – //DDoS^


If everything is “SEO Optimized”, how in the FUCK can I tell your company from another?

This “SEO” kind of thinking that has become so prevalent just seems to have an aggregatory knock-on effect that is eventually going to make the entirety of a particular industry subject to takeover.

Yeah...the whole fucking thing

A particular industry, gobbled up by some big player, all because it’s impossible to tell the difference between one company and another. There may even be a legal precedence to consider…. isn’t there already legal precedence for the distinguishing and distinguishment of businesses? That if two or more competing businesses are so similar in operation, purpose(s), price, etc., and if the market does not intervene, that government will and/or should?

Lotta dynamics to that, and I can’t recall them all, but yeah, that rings a bell.

^True Facts : Carnivorous Plants^

Just thinking about things that are in place to offset corruption. Take for example, the pipeline infrastructure in The United States.

PHMSA

I’ve heard it pronounced as “femza”, and they are part of The US Department of Transportation. But why wouldn’t they be part of USDOT? Any time, that anything moves, it’s being transported…right? Like say…electron transfer?

Money transfer?

But yeah…back to corruption. Why would I bring up corruption with respect to PHMSA?

Federal Pipeline and Oil-by-Rail Regulator Making 9% Staff Cut, Confounding Experts

There are said to be millions of miles of pipelines in this country. If PHMSA is a small group, that means that PHMSA dictates policy, you obey…

period.

So where does this perceived corruption start? My guess is going to be, that it starts when there is agreement as to what is acceptable and who it is acceptable to.

The US has one inspector for every 5,000 miles of pipeline—or twice the length of the country, each

Not like you can make a decision to use 1.5” pipe made out of steel for a 1,000 mile stretch of pipeline, and then suddenly say

“OOOPS!!! We shoulda used a 2” brass pipe instead.”

^Pleasurekraft, Jaceo, Vedic – The Most Dangerous Game [Official]^

Does a 1,000 mile long pipeline bend with the curvature of the Earth/Terra?

Does a 1,000 mile long anything bend with the curvature of the Earth/Terra?

I GUESS THEY DON’T IF THE EARTH IS ACTUALLY FLAT!!!!!!

OMG!!!

I JUST HAD THE STUPIDEST EPIPHANY IN HISTORY!!!

When you go somewhere, you take what you need with you…right?

Do you fold clothes before putting them in a suitcase?

Are there some clothes that you handle differently?

Like, do you own clothes that should NEVER be folded?

Prolly make special considerations for those. A clothes carrier perhaps.

But irrespective of what, you still figure out how to take what you need with you, and you figure out how to best get it there with little to no change or disruption…right?

Genetics and organics are starting to make more and more sense.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a46z0mS3NPM

^Depeche Mode – Shine ( trance mix 2015 HD* dj jean alpohin )^


If I spin a ball clockwise “here”, and spin the same ball anticlockwise “there”, what effect(s) does that have on the space(s) inbetween?

Are you having trouble imagining what I am describing? If so, do this…

  1. find a hair on your arm or leg…
  2. find another hair near it that you can draw a straight line to, one to the other…
  3. now imagine your bloodstream running underneath the skin…
  4. now imagine a red blood cell that is spinning clockwise near one hair, and the same blood cell is spinning anticlockwise near the second hair.

What effect(s) does that and those motions have on the space(s) between the hair(s)? What effect(s) does that have on the hair(s) and follicle(s) themselves? Are you incorporating enough axises to accommodate the spaces that allow this and these rotational actions? Are you being fractal in these thoughts? Are you being unidirectional enough in your analysis?

Surface Tension
Magnetism
Electromagnetic Field
Hypereosinophilic Syndrome
Eosinophilia
Eosinophil
Acidobacteria
Acidophile
Lactobacillus
Lactobacillus Acidophilus
Atmospheric Pressure
Decompression Sickness
Just keeping it real. Or at least, real-ish.
^Béla Fleck & The Original Flecktones – “Sinister Minister” – Mountain Jam VII – 6/3/11^

Is it possible that air-travel related illnesses may in fact be remiss in ignoring some more long-term effects that air travel has on the body over time?

Pressurized aircraft, non-pressurized aircraft, compressed air(s), temperature controlled buildings that are themselves pressurized…shit like that. We appear to be under a lot of pressure(s). Maybe that’s why everyone is presumed to be so goddamn grumpy.

^Stevie Wonder-Isn’t She Lovely Lyrics^

Speaking of pressure(s) and spin(s)…how in the fuck, can something that is made out of meat, be allergic to meat itself?

ALPHA-GAL SYNDROME: WHAT IS THE INCURABLE MEAT ALLERGY SPREAD BY TICKS?

There’s a lot of tumblers turning there.

     I need to chew on that story a bit.

No pun intended.
^Bela Fleck – Did you ever meet Gary Owen Uncle Joe?^

I’ve not made much progress. I started this on Sunday, but it’s now Tuesday. I supposed that one might could say that I’ve gotten lazy…

that I’ve become confused or sidetracked…

lost direction…

run out of things to say.

Could it be that my course is run, and it’s time for me to shut up?

Fold my tent?

Head for the hills?

Retire?

Welp, if I stay in the USA, I’ve got 20 years left until I can retire. I think I’ll keep going.

^501 – Infinity^

Here’s an interesting story…

How white women use strategic tears to avoid accountability

Would that be like…”utilization of strategic weapons to enforce your will”? Or…”seizing a strategic opportunity to query a person of a certain color, only because of your own color”? I mean, cops carry firearms and other weapons for a reason. The discharge of the firearm is irrelevant. A weapon is a weapon. A cell phone or radio can be a weapon if utilized properly. Hell, almost anything can be weaponized. But this weaponizing of people based on skin color or creed sounds…familiar.

Can't recall anything specific tho.
^Monstergetdown – Creature^

The more you travel through your life, the more you are likely to see unexpected shit. People thinking thoughts and creating and doing things that you yourself may have thought of. In fact, you may find things so similar, that they are damn near identical. Weird and strange things that you may have thought that you and only you have thought of. This is likely why economics can be so destructive. If you chase a dream with the expectations of a commercial return, you are likely going to wind up penniless and miserable. Thievery and shenanigans aside, sometimes, things just happen as they do.

^The Crystal Method – Name of the Game (Hybrid’s Blackout in LA Mix)^
Pressure,

pressure,

pressure.

Points in time = pressure?

That makes me think of something that occurred to me some time back. Let’s say, that there was a country or two, that were once at war. One of these countries, ended that particular theatre of war with a swift stroke or two. These “strokes” may have had unforeseen consequences. And so, as that “defeated” country recovered, and eventually more generations were born in the aftermath, there was this feeling of…vengeance. A need to avenge this defeat.

Q: Would long-term “sabotage” of sorts, be an effective method of exacting this revenge?

A: ¿!!!?

Or would that just be creating more of the same via a different path. Perpetuation of the stereotype(s). Perpetuation of the need for vengeance.

Black Rain

I guess you don’t fight vengeance. You cope.

^The Prototypes – Pale Blue Dot (Calyx & TeeBee Remix)^

BITCOIN!!!!!!!!!!!

Last night, I finally did a bit of digging on this topic. Turns out there is another called Etherium or something like that. Today, I watched an episode of Doctor Who, and this episode centered around some complexities with respect to calculations performed in certain spaces using certain elements, that themselves are molded into certain shapes. I was laying on the bed a few minutes ago, watching the sun traverse the sky, and it inspired me to write a short poem.

Calculations, and when they are thought to be complete/completed.

^Paul Keeley – New seclusion^

I don’t know if any of my ponderings are worth a fuck, so the best that I have to sustain me is that I must be thinking about this shit for some reason. Not to mention, that I wouldn’t be able to comprehend them. Which, to be fair, most of the things that I think about, I don’t understand nor do I try and pretend that I do. How is one to know, how to proceed?

^Karen Overton – Your loving Arms Full (Armin van Buuren Extended Vocal Mix)^

If I tell you how to have a particular experience, don’t I in effect prevent you from having one? Or at least, having your own?

That’s my beef with programs and precipices. You are taking someone, who is likely already “bent” or maybe even “broken”, and you are going to reinforce that brokenness with this new revolutionary and life-changing program that you have devised. You’ve basically reinvented and created a square hole, and are now encouraging people to jump through it, knowing full well that they won’t fit. If they fit, you don’t get to sell your program to them. It’s like canvassing a fat-farm for size 0-3 bikini models. Nevermind your shortsightedness if the first fat-farm you visit turns out to be all male.

I mean, you HAVE considered gender...right?
^Neonlight – Boom^
It’s tough to know what to encounter.

It’s tough to know how to encounter it.

^PEEKABOO – Arrival^

I watched the following vid, and it’s like…

”we will monitor what is happening under your own feet, we will assess, and we will tell you what to make of your own life.”

If you feel it in your interests to do so anyway. This is likely why people get so angry when shit goes wrong. You’ve given your proxy to someone to make decisions for you, and that is predicated on the fact that…

what?

You are so incompetent that you can’t make your own decisions? Or that others are so superior that they can? Both of those things? Do you forgive yourself for making mistakes? K…well…perhaps it was a mistake for you to sign away what you feel are your rights, forgive yourself, move on. You’ll know better next time.

^Hawaii Volcano Eruption Update – Tuesday Night (May 8 2018)^

And there’s this…

Scientists baffled after discovering signs of elusive time crystals in a kids’ toy

Carbon, Quartz, tides, cycles, radio, pulses. Yeah. You’ve got bits and pieces, and there are many. But what comprehension can we attain when the medium(s) and methods are so exclusive? Your fears are said to be well founded, and based in fact(s). But that also means that you do not trust the very future that you seek to know. As a result, the more complex the system, the more exclusive it will be, and the less that will have access to it. Just keep in mind that an isolation is a beacon like any other…

it just shines differently.

As best I can guess, most scientists never take the time to just sit and watch a clock. To ponder what is happening on each tick, and what is happening between. To wonder about others, their lives, what is transpiring in those lives, and how they cope. To intentionally blur your own clarity. To ponder what it is like to let clarity come to you. To learn how to let an epiphany or discovery go. To let The Universe provide us with something astounding, acknowledge the gift, perhaps even marvel at it a bit…and then give it back. To wander in the splendor of creation, and realize that every opportunity need not be capitalized upon.

That should provide some bias for better gauging what you personally should pursue, and maybe what to leave for others.

^Benny Benassi – Change Style^

We build our own civilization(s) on “the ruins” of others. We use the same principles and precepts that “collapsed” civilizations used. Ever stop to think that the suggestiveness of this and these contradictions might just cause some confusion?

We don't teach irony/ironies...do we?

Well, maybe thespians do, but not everyone is cut out for acting in front of others, and not everyone likes the theatre.

^Bastille – Pompeii (Live From Isle Of Wight Festival)^

Wanna know how “exclusive” things are? Easy. Talk about something you know nothing about, see who jumps on you, for what, and from where they spring. You’ll learn real fucking quick if others perceive you as being somewhere you shouldn’t be and/or doing something they feel you shouldn’t be doing. They’ll likely even tell you the opinion that you should have. If you adopt and adapt, they may even try and recruit you to their cause.

^CoLD SToRAGE – Cairodome^

Checked out some rentals in a certain town in England this week. Been looking abroad for an apartment/flat to lease where I could live for 3 to 4 months, take in the local wildlife, and do some writing on the experience. Find some place, wander in more or less blind, and see what I see. No real agenda, other than taking what I am given, then share my experience and experiences. It’s been a long time since I’ve dreamed like this, but it was kinda fun. Now all I have to do, is do it.

Ya'll ready for some storms over that way?
^LTJ Bukem – Atlantis^

cYa | cFa

^Wontolla, Kasger & Limitless – Miles Away [NCS Release]^

*******

*Innit, Clicky! …/pat snout… Sets me up nicely for tomorrow…*

Dear Reader, have a Song ❤

Missive From ‘Merica: Clicky Led

Clicky speaks

*******

2 + 0 = 1

Sounds impossible? There is a blessing to standardization. It is indicative of a contextual significance. An era. An epoch. A time. What is significant about an obelisk that is not standing up?

I dunno

What is significant about an obelisk that is standing up? I bet it’s pretty fucking significant if it’s standing, but about to fall. Prolly also significant if it is standing, then falls with little to no warning. How’d that thing stand up anyway?

Prolly aliens + tractor beams
^Fatboy Slim – Right Here, Right Now (CamelPhat Remix)^


I haven’t seen one of these vids appear in a while, but suddenly…here one is.

WARNING: You may want to turn your volume down prior to watching. For some odd reason, this vid is loud as fuck.

PRO TIP: After watching the vid, don’t forget to set your volume back to where it was prior to watching it.

🙂

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NQRGaqR6Ls

^strange Trumpet sounds from the sky caught on live TV Volume 20^

So here's the dealio

I’m writing three different posts at the same time,

they’ll be posted in three different places, and

all three are gonna start off with the same three paragraphs.

But they’ll each go their own way after these first three paragraphs. I’ll write/post one here, I’ll write/post one over at my WordPress blog, and the other I’ll send over to RooBeeDoo to see what she comes up with. I’ve not been doing a lot of writing lately, but I sure as shit have been thinking about it.

I’m about to undertake some scary endeavors, and I’ve been working hard to dial my writing back since December of last year in preparation for these endeavors. I’ve also been trying to be mindful of what I read and watch. Limiting my intake, if you will. But last night, I started to feel just downright depressed. Like someone had kicked me in the junk, ‘cept with none of the actual pain and all of the actual depression.

As I lay on my bed and contemplated while I felt so shitty, I got the impression that I just flat out missed writing all the time. There are other things I miss as well, but I can’t do anything about that. So, I’ll focus on those things I can do something about. At this stage in my life, there is really only one thing that I have some limited ability to control, and that is my writing, and where and when I choose to write it. Let’s onward with the…whatever this is.

BREAK!
^CamelPhat – Drop It^


Is there a difference between something that is standing up, and something that is not? I mean, even if they are the same goddamn thing, if it’s laying down, it’s not the same thing laying down that it is when it’s standing up…right? Do I need to bring up penises?

lolz...bring up penises...lolz

This is the downside to talking ethics. There is an implied decorum that needs to be maintained. I assume that this decorum is to maintain and/or achieve some sort of purity. But what in the FUCK is “pure” about dreaming up and enacting legislation pertaining to murder? Or is it the path that purifies us, as we walk from the point of origin(s) that put us on this muddy and despicable trail of tears, all in order to get us to where we need to be?

Yeah, ethics suck

If you are clean, you gotta get dirty in order to understand what it is that draws your particular snout to the pig sty. If you are dirty, you gotta listen to the same uppity righteous fucks that likely created whatever shithole you are trying to climb out of. It’s a mess.

^Hot Since 82 – Veins (Original Mix)^

Let’s go this direction for a bit…

Obelisk of Axum
Tiya (Archaeological Site)
King Ezana’s Stela
Eritrean Highlands
Rift Valley Fever
Great Rift Valley, Kenya
Great Rift Valley, Ethiopia
East African Rift
Divergence
Abuse of Notation
Intuition

Would intuition be what it is, if it were more standardized? Thinking now about the curvature of our planet and certain spaces, there is a potential for nullification based on a contextual proximity within time. That is to say, that “not all sacred sites are the same”. Sure, they are all “sacred”…

but to who?

When?

Where?

So with that in mind, is the Tevatron the same thing as the LHC?

Tevatron

Large Hadron Collider

If they are the same thing, why are there two of them? Do we need two of the same thing? Or is one more/less significant than the other?

^Mark Knight – Your Love (Original Club Mix)^

Let's see what Boogie2988 is up to

He mentions something about a YouTube purge.

My Twitter has been acting wonky for about a week.

I wonder if any of this shit has any affect on Bitcoin.

^I’M FINALLY FIGURING IT ALL OUT… RECOVERY LESSONS.^

What…in the FUCK…is “body dysmorphia”?

Body Dysmorphic Disorder
Alien Hand Syndrome
Body Integrity Identity Disorder
Somatoparaphrenia
Hemispatial Neglect
Acquired Brain Injury
Synonyms of Arterial Tortuosity Syndrome
Dystonia
Human Factors and Ergonomics
Ergonomic Hazard
Vibration
Repetitive Strain Injury
Space Psychology
Kinesiology
Podiatry
Reflexology

If you sit in a certain chair, at a certain desk, and you do this over a certain period of time…

but then suddenly

… you find yourself in a different chair, at a different desk, for different periods of time…

Q: Does that have an effect on anything at all?

A: Or are you just a piece of meat?

Yeah, I don’t know how to deal with bitter acerbity either.

^Solardo – On The Corner^


Yesterday, I did a search on YouTube for “spiritual awakening” just because I’ve not kept up with that shit in a while. I don’t even remember what I found, because I wound up trying to start watching Part 3 of that Ouija Board documentary. I dig rest.

Let’s hop over to YouTube real quick, I’m gonna search for “spiritual awakening” again – without quotes – and I’m going to link the 3rd video on the 3rd page of the search results. Sound good? Let’s do it!

<rawr> ;-P

JESUS H. CHRIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The 3rd video on the 3rd page is motherfucking 1 hour, 46 minutes, and 5 seconds long!!!

I ain’t watching that bullshit!!!

First rattle out of the fucking bag, the goddamn video tells me to go read a coupla prophesies from Nostradamus before watching the video. Now, why on EARTH would someone want me to pause the video, grab a book, and read a bit before watching the video?

Hmmmmm

Could it be to get you used to the fact, that in order to proceed in your continued “growth”, you are going to need books,

and home videos,

and daily chant guides,

and daily mantra guides,

and t-shirts,

and bumper stickers,

and laminated bookmarks with clever shit written on them,

and coffee mugs,

and all kinds of other ancillary market types of shit to take along with you, as you trek to god knows where for the quarterly retreats that are held for select “gold members” at the temple?

Anyway, here’s the video if you wanna watch it. I only made it to 1 minute 43 seconds.

^The Laws of the Sun – Spiritually Awakening Movie – OFFICIAL^

If I keep talking about the same shit over and over, does that create some sort of repetitive type injury?

O RLY? To whom?

Yeah, to whom does this injury occur? To me? To anyone who reads my bullshit? Both? Anyway, I’ve seen this gal’s stuff before, and may have even watched and linked this particular video at some point. But there seems to be an infatuation in certain sectors of the synchrosphere with “the shining”.

Clicky squints

Shining
Shining
Illumination
Illumination
Clairvoyance
Synchrotron
Synchrotron Radiation
Synchroscope
Synchronicity

I find this concept of “specificity within the synchrosphere” to be ironic, since specificity seems to be contrary to the nature of synchronicity. That said, a lot of these concepts may not be new, but they are new to some of us. So, let’s see what she has to say about something very specific, and how this specificity may relate to “spiritual awakening”.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wuRUJqAVwIY

^How to Develop Clairvoyance, How to Become Clairvoyant, How it Works!^


A few weeks ago, the street light across the way went out. The street was dark as shit for a coupla weeks, and it was just damn nice outside at night because you could actually see at night without that fucking beacon blinding the fuck out of you. However, it has now been replaced, and they replaced the one light, with two. Not only that, the fucking thing is bright white instead of the pale amber of the previous street light.

The whole goddamn street is now bright as shit at night

I wanted to take some pics of the full moon, but I now can’t because of that goddamn beacon that is right in the path of the moon/Luna’s ascension.

😐

^SYMBOLOGY AND YOU. How SYMBOLS Affect Your Subconscious Mind WITHOUT Knowing It + ANCIENT Symbols^

I’m not trying to knock these people, but a lot of this shit sounds like the parroting of something you’ve learned, and you are following the program or system step by step in order, as you’ve been taught to do. I know that I do this all the time. So, what is it that we are trying to break out of? Why are we trying to break out of it? Are we searching for intuition? Are we searching for our own intuition?

Standardized anything is going to seek to quash intuition, so maybe that’s the sudden infatuation with enlightenment via ancient mysteries and/or mystery schools and the like.

Temple of Set

Harry Houdini

Spiritualism

BLOOPS!!! I guess there’s nothing new about it. ‘Cept for maybe we are getting to know our neighbors a bit better without even realizing we were doing so.

Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania

What, in the name of all that is holy, could Wilkes-Barre Pennsylvania have to do with the price of tea in Antarctica? I dunno. But I can think of one person that this town might ring a bell with.

^Shiba San – OKAY^


Been watching Dr. Who, Deadwood, and Adventure Time with a certain someone. I’m still kinda iffy on the whole “remote viewing” angles of this particular activity, but I’m kinda comfortable with my own cluelessness, so whatever.

/me shrugs

Remote Viewing

I can only imagine, that anyone gaining access to my head/being, the first fucking thought is going to be

“GET ME THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!!!”

The only reason that I can see that someone would want direct access to the fabric of another being…

Truth

But doesn’t truth loose some of its meaning when the filters and filtering that is already in place are circumnavigated and/or circumvented? It can’t be truth if I don’t want or need to tell it. So there’s an implied duality or binary nature to getting to “the truth” by the action of telling. What we tell, and how…

Perception(s) and perspective(s)

I mean, just because you can plug a lamp into an electrical socket, is no guarantee that the lamp will light.

^Mark The Beast – Breathe (ft. Niks)^

I narrowed my YouTube search to only show results from videos that were posted this week. This was the latest one, and it appears to have been posted 7 hours ago.

 Today is Tuesday May 1st, 2018, and it's currently 12:48 CDT

It appears this video is a talk more than a video, and it’s some gal talking about the menstrual cycle. I’m not female. This talk has fuckall to do with me. But it does make me think about fibrous material(s). That makes me think about Morgellon’s. Not that I ever think about fibrous material(s) potentially being an issue for women that use certain feminine hygiene products or anything.

Aponeurosis
Apnea
Toxic Shock Syndrome
Morgellons
Innate Immune System
Symptom
Diagnosis Code

Is it possible that Morgellon’s is actually a form of Toxic Shock Syndrome? I mean, I personally am allergic to everything under the fucking sun. Not to mention, anyone can become allergic to anything, at any time. Shellfish are OK for eating today, but tomorrow, eating them kills you. So…with that in mind…

Q: What changed?

A: I dunno either.

Maybe we can figure it out.

Or at least develop some coping mechanisms.

/shrug
^Red Moon: Goddess Teachings & Meditations for Female Spiritual Awakening^

This isn’t really where I intended to go.

I intended to go nowhere in particular.

Can both of these statements be true?
^Deadmau5 – There Might Be Coffee (1080p) || HD^


When I see someone’s profile pic on Twitter, and I get the googly eyes because she is very pretty, is there a certain procedure or protocol that I supposed to follow at that point? Am I supposed to message them and say “YO BITCH YOU ARE HOT AS FUCK!!!” or something similar? Or do I just wait for the erection to subside, then go about my business.

Actually, I don’t think I’ve ever actually gotten a boner from looking at some gal’s pic. But I’ve gotten butterflies a time or two. Anyway, I never thought of Twitter as some dating service or place to meet chicks to hook up with. I guess being married will do that to a fella, and subsequently being divorced doesn’t change much in that regard.

But I do often contemplate the mechanics of meeting someone. I mean, I’m single again, so why wouldn’t I contemplate this? To be honest, it scares the shit out of me because I had long been under the assumption that I’d be married for the rest of my life. Plus, what if one of these gals I get the googly eyes and butterflies over is married or in a relationship already? I can handle someone seeing my pic and throwing up. I’ve had this face for a long time and am familiar with the response it tends to generate.

Meh…I’ve no idea what to do, nor even if I should do anything. I think I’ll just keep doing what I’m doing, which is nothing. At least that’s something.

^Summertime Rolls – Jane’s Addiction.wmv^
MAYDAY!!! MAYDAY!!! MAYDAY!!!

May Day

I’ve seen some “witchy types” posting something about some other name to call this, so lemme go see if I can find what that something is.

Beltane

BELTANE!!!

Speaking of belts, my mother gave me all of my father’s old belts. I mean, the guy is dead, so he ain’t gonna need them anymore. Anyway, I was looking at one of the older ones, and it got me to wondering how many lashes I got over the years with that particular belt.

It’s wide,

it’s thick,

it’s long,

made of leather,

and left many a welt on my

back,

arms,

legs,

hands,

and sometimes even my ass. Not that he was a bad aim, but he usually had to suspend me in the air by dangling me from one of my arms.

I was not real receptive to being repeatedly struck with a heavy piece of leather, but one day, that all changed. I bent over, grabbed my ankles, and never made a peep through all 12 lashes. He, was stunned. But I think when it was over, and I turned to face him, and shot him a look of hate bound by fury, I think I scared him. He was almost speechless, and eventually stammered a congratulations to me on my “not going to the tear department”, but our relationship forever changed that day.

He retired the belt, and never used it on me again. I’ll not elaborate as to the direction that the violence took after the belt was retired, but you can probably imagine. I was 12 years old.

^Paul Keeley- Run To You (Original Mix)^


I gotta run because this one is getting kinda long, and I’ve two more of these I need to go write, then get back to watching Deadwood and Dr Who with a certain someone. But before I go, I got a parting query. There are many that espouse this “living for the day” mentality to others. To seize opportunity, and not to wait. But I’ve got a question for you…

Q: Aren’t you worth waiting for?

A: I think you are

Doesn’t matter if it’s 5 seconds or 5 years. I’m betting that you are worth waiting for.

I think you are pretty awesome, and I don’t even really know you.

Not even sure what “knowing” really means in this context.

You learn, you grow, you change, you…

do whatever in the fuck you do.

So “knowing” can’t be just and only about fucking.

But yeah, I’ve got a feeling about you, and I don’t even know who you are.

Now all you have to do, is sort out/figure out who I am talking to and/or referencing.

Good luck

❤

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qdx4kWn3Cpc

^Mango – Sayonara (Original Mix)^


cYa | cFa

^Dave Horne – In Our Dreams (Original Mix) [HD]^

*******

dolphin wave

Missive From ‘Merica: With ADDED WOO

Been on a bit of cultural exchange these past two weeks, Dear Reader…

Adventure Time

*Indeed, Clicky! …/pats snout…*

… Whereby I’ve been introducing The Okie Devil of Text Us to Doctor Who…

*It’s been an Utter joy, Clicky, bouncing around time and space with Cade… /lights up… Seeing things anew…*

… And in return, he has introduced me to Doowdaed…

*No shit! It’s called Deadwood?! …/rubs eyes… Actually, Clicky, that does makes more sense… /drags…*

… And we’ll continue with more of that later today…

*/coughs… I ain’t shown him that one yet! …/taps ash… Mind you… /smokes… touch and hearing in one clip, Clicky? Fucking clever!*

Woo Hoo

In the meantime, Cade has very kindly sent a missive for us all to enjoy, Dear Reader…

*******

giphy

Where have I been?

Where have YOU been is likely a more appropriate question.

I've been taking a break.

Getting my bikini figure into shape for Bikini Season.

Let’s remedy that.

^DJ Shredda – Chainsaw (The Crow Mix)^

Let me come clean. I’ve been avoiding anything and everything on the web, except Twitter, and I’ve been doing that for the last few months. I don’t care what it is, I don’t want to see it, and I don’t want to hear it. Those “pokes from else and/or elsewhere” have gotten too numerous. My feet, legs and hips are cramping almost non-stop, and it fucking hurts.

So yeah...vacation.

I keep thinking about some 16 year old girl shooting herself. Can’t get it out of my fucking head. That, and this goddamn anti-smoking bullshit. Oh, and I’m trying to write. So there’s that. I also keep swirling around swirls. That has led me to some interesting thoughts on “flat space(s)”, so I’m gonna ramble about some of that…

assuming it's A-O-fucking-K with you.
^Acid Fighter (DJ Crow Remix) – Soundgrabber^


So what’s up with you where you are? It’s snowing outside here. Gonna put my cold weather gear on in a bit, go outside, and make a video. I doubt very seriously that most fucks are going to believe that it’s snowing in North Texas in late April, but it is. Once I make the video, we’ll have proof, the case will be solved forever, and there will be no reason to argue about the truth of spring snow(s) in Texas. I’ll keep you posted on where you can view the video.

^DJ The Crow meets DJ Arne LII – The Speed (Überdruck Mix)^


Why in the fuck would anyone care if North Korea/South Korea reunified? You running low on shit to talk about? Running low on shit to worry about? East Germany and West Germany got back together.

Maybe if you fucks would stop thinking in terms of big and small, you could actually focus. Or at least, make some discernment(s) as to what focus is.

Which reminds me, I got to thinking about the nature of focus with respect to membranes, and it got me to thinking about what is required to stretch a something so thin, that it results in the reduction of mass in certain sectors of the stretched membrane in such a way as to detract/reduce scale. Meaning, the reduction in mass does not cause a fundamental change in anything except scale.

Shrinking.

Basically, a chain of say…Oxygen atoms…have become so stretched, all while retaining their relational bonds, that some atoms begin to shrink in scale. Methinks we are stumbling into/onto some gravity/anti-gravity kinds of things here.

^Norman Bass – How U Like Bass? (Warp Brothers Club Mix)^

Thinking more in terms of contextual processes that are created for the purpose(s) of creating something that does not currently exist, there are certain things that we can accept as being, for the most part…normal. Like say, the creation of a house using wood, that starts with the chopping down of a tree, and is followed by the chopping down of more trees.

Pretty normal sounding right?

Welp, what about slamming sub-atom particles together at near the speed of light using the machines that we build in order to achieve this? Is that normal? Or can we consider it “normal” to qualify these activities as…abnormal.

Q: Is “sawdust” considered waste?

A: ???

Do we have processes in place to adequately deal with the ongoing sawdust issue(s)? Have we taken steps? Addressed concerns? Is the matter settled?

^Crash Bass – Hardshake^

Let’s focus

Focus (Optics)

Let’s get more focused

   Focus

We on the same page?

Let us turn it
^Gary Beck – Say What (Adam Beyer Remix) [SAVED RECORDS]^

I wonder how many membranes are breached in order to perform an “average” surgery.

Fascia
Fibromyalgia
Crystal Habit (Redirected from Fiberous habit)
Fiber
Dietary Fiber
Biodegradable Waste
Tortuous
Tortuosity
Tortious Interference
Tortuosamine
What Is a Tortuous Artery?
Twisted Blood Vessels: Symptoms, Etiology and Biomechanical Mechanisms

So can we assume that there is a difference between a perforation and a cut/incision? What about a stretch or strain? Wouldn’t an incision by a laser be both a perforation and a cut? No to mention the burn(ing).

^Hanayo – Joe le Taxi^


It’s just passed noon on Saturday April 28, and I’ve not been sleeping well. I’ve been dreaming non-stop for months now, but I guess its the season change that is currently fucking me up. I went on a 5 day drinking bender last week, and it did me some good. But still not sleeping very well. Guess I’m sweating heading to Austin a bit. Leaving for Austin soon, and looking forward to it, but also kinda nervous. The dynamics of the trip have suddenly changed. I’ll survive it tho. May even have some fun.

/me shrugs

On the up side, I’ve got the fever to write.

On the down side, I’m gonna be without my computer for a while.

I guess it's time to break out the pen and paper.

OH! I’ve got three stories in the new Underdog Anthology which was published this last week.

UAV front cover all named

I guess I need to write a post on it on my own goddamn blog.

^M83 ‘Midnight City’ Official video^


Got to thinking about the referential dynamics of gene sequences the other day, and the numbers went from “ridiculous” to “incomprehensible” almost immediately.

Picture This: two identical strands of DNA. One of these strands is located in the heart, and the other is flowing within the bloodstream. Now, imagine these two strands in relation to one another. Now think about the sequence in each strand. Do the sequences remain constant? What about in relation to each other?

I mean, we are talking more about cryptography/cryptology than we are about relationships or gene sequences/gene sequencing, so what about discretion, distinction and/or discrimination? Is there potentially some magic in the spacial relationships and orientations of identical things? What about like things? Similar not same kinds of things?

Cryptography
Discernment
Discernment of Spirits
Discrimination

So yeah, if you get two identical things together, what are they now?

Spooky action at a distance?

Or does the action always and forever need to follow a predefined path?

^Boy Harsher — Pain^

Was talking to a certain someone this week about “GUT”, and espoused that this particular pursuit is going to have to include multiple elements, and that the omission of a simultaneous “constructive/destructive” is likely why these efforts to construct a unification continues to fail and/or be elusive.

Grand Unified Theory

Whatever this “GUT” winds up being will have to have contextual nature, and I added Earth/Terra and Sun/Sol distinctions.

EX: The GUT on Earth/Terra will not be applicable on Mars, and the GUT on The Sun/Sol will differ from the GUT on Earth/Terra. We are in motion, and the only constant state appears to be that of “change” and/or “changing”, depending on where you are and when.

Perspective(s).

So yeah, there is likely a metric shitload of fucktons of galactic considerations that also need to be made. Maybe The Zodiac ain’t such a stretch afterall, eh? I mean, if these distant gamma ray bursts are suddenly of global concern because we can now see/detect them, that means that they’ve always been a concern. So I got a question for you…

Q: What’s your fucking hurry?

A: ¿?¿

Maybe if you fucks weren’t so goddamn wrapped up in the fatalistic ends of the more modern interpretations Darwinian theory/theories, you wouldn’t be so fucking anxious to win your very own Darwin Award, and take the rest of us with you in the process.

^Kiesza – Hideaway (Official Video)^

Yes, I am suggesting that certain sectors of science seem to be pretty goddamn fatalistic. I mean fuck, we can get that fatalism bullshit from religion. We don’t need it from you too.

But you’re free to do what you want.

Blow it all up.

😐
^Azari & III – Hungry for the power (Jamie Jones remix)^

 My brain hurts.

Imma go get something to eat, then video the snow for anyone who wants to see it.

^’I FINK U FREEKY’ by DIE ANTWOORD (Official)^

cYa | cFa

^Hey Boy Hey Girl (Soulwax ‘2 Many DJ’s’ Remix)^

*******

Feeding time

*Yeah, I’m hungry too, Clicky… /stubs butt… Let’s get sumfin to eat…*

Dear Reader? CYL… 😉 …and have a Song ❤

HBD Dr One! From The Okie Devil & RBD2

Two things, Dear Reader…

*No, Clicky… /flicks lighter… two items to cover off in this post… /lights up…*

First up, the soon to be published Underdog Anthology V has finally got a title…

*Knot quite… /puffs… Similar, Clicky…*

Six in Five in Four

Leggy tells me there will be 20 stories in all, not including the Foreword and Afterword, which I guess makes…

1260827856769

*/drags… twenty-two… /squints… and knot Tutu, Clicky… /taps ash…*

I have two stories included: ‘Nine Lives‘ and a new ‘Harry‘ story called, ‘Jackanory Jackalope’…

jacka_gif_by_nymla-d8r8ffl

*/coughs … It’s a spring-time book, Clicky… /clears throat… There has to be a rabbit…*

… In witch, the Legend of the Jackalope is recounted by a…

My good friend, Cade, who has three fantabulous stories in UAV, imparted the legend to me. I hope I’ve been able to do it justice ❤

4ff1399596a83ae049d3575ee7ee5aba

*Okay… /drags… thanks for keeping me on track, Clicky… /blows smoke ring…*

The second thing, Dear Reader, is to say a big, fat ‘Happy Birthday’ to The Underdog…

Dr One

… And to give him his pressie, made by Cade, from both of us. Leggy may recognise the lyrics 😉

*My besties are SO fucking clever and talented, Clicky… /stubs butt… I AM the luckiest woman in the whirled…*

*Yes, you too, Clicky… /pats snout…*

Five Alive? Defo!

*Ah cool image, Clicky… /pat snout… Actually my hair hasn’t looked like that once this week… /lights up…*

Dear Reader, I have been on holiday these last couple of days, and have finally managed to write my short story about a hedge riding hag…

feather powered happiness

*I am pretty happy with the result, Clicky…/puffs…*

…and have submitted it to Leggy for inclusion in the upcoming ‘Underdog Anthology V‘. The story is called ‘Nine Lives’…

*I’ve still got time to mutilate a poem for the Afterword before I go back to work, Clicky… /drags… If I can find the right one… /billows smoke…*

I was also able to spend some time yesterday in the Blue universe. Frank Davis had been snooping around New York, after reading about the proposed bill to stop people from smoking whilst walking the streets of that fair city…

*They’re fucking unbelievable! …/flicks ash… First you can’t smoke inside, and now the utopian dreamers are trying to dictate where and how you can smoke outside… /deep drag… Nasty Not-sees indeed… /sighs…*

He was looking at street signs there and came across one that had him perplexed…

‘Just a few yards away was another really weird sign. I think it was some sort of aphorism. But I couldn’t make out what it said, because it seemed to be written in bleeding, dripping letters that said something like Afraid And Dead. I guess that if you were crossing 2nd Avenue and you stopped to try to figure out what the scary sign meant, you’d find out when you got hit by a truck.’

It puzzled me, too; however, the photo Frank included was somewhat fuzzy, so I sent Clicky off for a closer inspection…

sign for blue frank

*Much better but it still looks like worshipers or sumfin’ to me, Clicky… /drags deeply… In sinister black… /snorts smoke…*

… and find an answer.

school for deaf street sign new york

*Those are hands!*

hans gruber

*/reads slowly… School For Deaf …/squints… Dept of Transport… /final drag… Oh! The yellow buses! It’s a bus stop sign, Clicky! … /streams smoke…*

applause sign

*Alright, don’t take the piss… /stubs butt… Well done you, though, on working it out… There’s a good assistant… /pats snout…*

It was a sign for deaf school children, Dear Reader…

…As my good friend, Cade, might say…

‘MYSTERY SOLVED! NEXT!’

music sign

*Okay then…/lights up… And as you’re such a clever Clicky, you can choose…*

Dear Reader… Have a Song 😀

 

Breakfast Embed Part 3 – SkRAM Booled

HOWDY!!!

giphy3

*Wha? Whaddaya mean I fucked that up? Who the fuck are you, and what in the fuck do you know about what is or is not, fucked up? /me snorts*

Err…I mean, Greetings Dear Reader. I am still Mr. Slimey and I’m still filling in for RooBeeDoo and her Dolphin assistant Clicky, both of whom may in fact be vacationing somewhere in España. I’ve currently no proof to substantiate this claim, but maybe they’ll provide photographic and/or some other evidence upon their safe return.

 

giphy4

*Ya know, at a cursory glance, she appears to be both bipedal and reasonably agile/mobile. Why exactly she’s crawling around on all fours is…mysterious…*

It appears that there is indeed a need for this 3rd part, but let’s let the lady take over at this point, and she can steer us in the direction of wherever it is we need be.

*******

https://youtu.be/u18b65Om2jA

 

*I dunno, Clicky… /flicks lighter… I had started writing a post on the John Lamb Lash video talks… /shakes lighter… New format… /flicks lighter… He’s got a Limey companion now, called Ginny… /shakes lighter again… I’m enjoying the Anglo-Yank combo… /flicks lighter… Reminds of a sumfin’… /gives up and rummages through handbag…*

Not sure what Part 3, Cade thinks we need, Dear Reader…

* /rolls eyes… Oh okay, Clicky… /finds working light… *

This here is a post I started writing this afternoon, before Cade sent back the top and tailing for the Inchoate Egg story posts published earlier: Part 1 and Part 2. It’s called…

The Hierophant In The Womb

hierophant (n.)

“expounder of sacred mysteries,” 1670s, from Late Latin hierophantes, from Greek hierophantes“one who teaches the rites of sacrifice and worship,” literally “one who shows sacred things,” from hieros “sacred,” from PIE root *eis-, forming words denoting passion (see ire) + phainein“to reveal, bring to light” (from PIE root *bha- (1) “to shine”). In modern use, “expounder of esoteric doctrines,” from 1822.

This morning my good friend Shiny posted me a story link on MEROVEE, over in the Red universe, Dear Reader…

*A born to be wild thing, caught smoking… /lights up… And scientists are baffled, Clicky? …/scans text… Ah, Nag Role sumfin’ or another…  /deep drag… In D I A… /streams smoke…*

‘“I believe the elephant may have been trying to ingest wood charcoal,” said Dr Varun Goswami, WCS India scientist and elephant biologist.

‘“She appeared to be picking up pieces from the forest floor, blowing away the ash that came along with it, and consuming the rest.”’

And the reason the scientists think she’s taking up smoking, Dear Reader?

‘The charred lumps of wood can also serve as a laxative to the pachyderms who are able to consume it in the wild after forest fires and lightning strikes.’

belly laugh.gif

*/grins… And Shiny posted it in the Red ‘Excretion’ universe of MRS REGN? Priceless… /puffs merrily…*

capnomancy (n.)

“divination by smoke,” c. 1600, with -mancy“divination by means of” + Latinized form of Greek kapnos “smoke,” which is of uncertain origin, perhaps a non-Indo-European substrate word that also produced Lithuanian kvapas “breath, smell,”kvepiu, kvėpti “to gasp, breathe,” Latvian kvept“to smoke, smell,” and perhaps Latin vapor.

That’s as far as I got, Dear Reader. It is a “very great fact”, as John Lamb Lash might say, that elephants never forget…

https://youtu.be/dbKTdVpnGj8

Reich-ous Hitler lost his War, Dear Reader. So if Lashy is correct in his telling of the Sophia Correction narrative, it rather begs the question:

Q: If Adolf had the whole fucking planet on his side, how in the hell did he lose?

A: Could it be?

Nah! It’s not like tobacco is associated with a goddess or sumfin’…

‘And at the spot where they had burned First Mother’s bones, there grew another plant, broad-leafed and fragrant. It was First Mother’s breath, and they heard her spirit talking: “Burn this up and smoke it. It is sacred. It will clear your minds, help your prayers, and gladden your hearts.”

‘And First Mother’s husband called the first plant Skarmunal, corn, and the second plant utarmur-wayeh, tobacco.

‘“Remember,” he told the people, “and take good care of First Mother’s flesh, because it is her goodness become substance. Take good of her breath, because it is her love turned into smoke. Remember her and think of her whenever you eat, whenever you smoke this sacred plant, because she has given her life so that you might live. Yet she is not dead, she lives: in undying love she renews herself again and again.”’

Two things happened this week. One with little mainstream media coverage…

*/final drag…*

… And one saturated…

*/stubs butt…*

That’s quite enough for now, Dear Reader. Locking up the LoL for tonight before we get arrested… Have a Song 😉

*******

Thanks for having me 😀

giphy5

That’s all there is for now, and there ain’t no fucking more.

It’s time for you and all your parts, to hit the fucking door.

Get your seated ass de-planted, and get your knees unbent.

Put some swagger in those hips, just in time for end of Lent.

The eggzit is where you’re headed, head there now and soon.

Or else I’ll chase you out with my….say, where’d I put my broom?

giphy6

Seriously…I’m not fucking around…get gone.

❤

https://youtu.be/vTE4GXaPodk

Breakfast Embed Part 1 – Ova Easty

Dear Reader, I hate to be the one to inform you of this, but the task has fallen to me to inform you of that, which you do not know. Hang on a sec…

giphy

*wtf was that noise? Nope…no one there. Musta been the wind …/me shrugs…*

Anyway, erm, where was I? OH YEAH!!! Tragedy has befallen RooBeeDoo, and she appears to have lost her fucking mind. Mainly because she asked me to write the opening and closing bits of a post or two. And who am I, you might ask? My name is Mr. Slimey, but I don’t mind if you call me Mr. S.

Begging your pardon, but would you mind hanging on again for one more moment? I shan’t be long.

giphy1

* Hmmm…that’s weird. Strange noises, strange events, but no space dolphin to be found anywhere. How odd…*

The story that follows is a story written by RooBeeDoo called The Inchoate Egg, and it’s a good one. I know it’s a good story because I’ve read it. Good? Nah…it’s great. A great story, that I now present it to you without much further delay. Just gotta close all these random opening doors.

Enjoy your read, and catch ya on the flipside.

*******

airplane glance

*Aww… Nice work with the doors btw, Clicky… /pats snout… Cade’s got a story in the next Anthology… /scratches nose… ’bout a door or sumfin’…*

Thank you, Cade ❤

Dear Reader, as it’s nearly Easter, I thought I’d post my second story from ‘The Underdog Anthology II: Tales The Hollow Bunnies Tell’, last year’s Easter-themed, collective offering…

*Oh I thought it would be fun, Clicky… /lights up… if Cade provided bread… /drags… and I provided the filling for a Missive sammich… /streams smoke…*

I’ve split it in two, so ‘The Inchoate Egg’ will be concluded in a following post. Hopefully today…

*/squints… ‘Vanillin’? …/flicks ash… Do you think they mean vanilla, Clicky? …/shrugs…*

… If not, then tomorrow. Enjoy! 😀

The Inchoate Egg

by Roo B. Doo

“Patience is a virtue, Harry,” Payroll Pammy chimed as she glided past the elevator on the way to the kitchen, carrying a tray of empty mugs. I was inside the lift, gnashing my teeth while I waited for the doors of the ancient mechanism to close. Pammy evidently shared the consensus opinion of the minions at F A Kontrell, that the elevator to our 5th floor offices is ‘very slow’.

More like fucking glacial, I fumed, as I stood over the control panel and angrily jabbed at the ‘door close’ button, each jab accompanied by an entreaty to “close, you fucking bastard.” Slowly, the door halves started their whiny crawl toward each other and were just about to touch when a smooth, tanned hand, topped with exquisitely polished pink fingernails, halted their long awaited reunion by adroitly sliding between them.

“Hold the lift, please!”

I recognised both the hand and voice, and my chest tightened at the thought of being in close proximity with the office goddess I’d lusted after. I felt a tinge of fear too, if I’m honest, as the last time we’d been alone together hadn’t exactly worked out that well for me. Josie looked surprised to see me lurking in the corner of the lift, finger still hovering over the ‘door close’ button. It must have looked as if I were deliberately trying to shut her out.

“Oh, hello Harry,” she said sheepishly. She moved to the opposite corner at the back of the lift, putting as much distance between us as she could. “How are you?”

“I’ve been worse.”

The words hung between us and I wondered if, like me, she was remembering the night several months ago when Alfie, her brick shithouse of a boyfriend, had tried to kill me over a misunderstanding. He came home from work unexpectedly and thought I was trying to debauch his girl with an obscene Secret Santa gift. As If!

Of course I had been trying to gain access to the fair Josie’s knickers, but not with anything so crass as the oversized sex toy that Alfie had seized upon. I’d been using an entirely more tasteful gift, targeting Josie’s weakness for chocolate. It was classy and it had nearly worked too.

I turned back to the control panel and resumed my button jabbing, minus the swearing. For once the lift doors effortlessly glided together first time with barely a murmur, sealing us in. The lift compensated for the unexpected quiet efficiency with a gut flipping jolt before starting its grindingly slow journey downwards.

Well this is awkward, I thought.

Josie and I hadn’t really spoken since that night. She’d been avoiding me and my ardour had been tempered somewhat by the painfully real threat of a good hiding from her boyfriend. Mr Kontrell, a.k.a. the Fat Kontroller, had called me a ‘Good Egg’ after I’d declined to press charges – so reluctant was he to see his company dragged through the mud that he offered me a substantial pay rise in return for keeping my mouth shut.

It was an offer I was happy to accept. Besides, I didn’t want to sabotage any future chance with Josie by being the cause of her boyfriend being locked up, no matter how much the animal deserved it. That I’d survived Alfie’s ire at all was entirely down to the girl herself, who’d stop his murderous rampage with a substantial kick to his bollocks. I only wished I’d been conscious to see it.

The silence between us was deafening over the groaning lift mechanism. I decided to break it. “So, are you bunking off early?”

I turned toward Josie and she smiled back shyly. Fuck, but she is beautiful, I thought, and felt my stomach flutter. I smiled back, drinking in the delicacy of her elfin features framed by glossy, black hair, and not to mention a smoking hot body that would cause Elle McPherson to weep. To think, I’d been that close to sticking my tongue down her throat.

“Yes, kind of,” she replied, “I’ve been asked to attend the county-wide business awards ceremony tonight, so I’m going to work from home this afternoon.”

I took a sharp intake of breath. “The one at the civic centre?” I asked slowly. What the fuck!

“Yes,” Josie hesitated, “Shazza’s asked me if I’d go. Apparently one of the guests can’t make it now.”

“Oh right.” I nodded slowly and tried to keep my voice neutral, “we’re up for ‘Green Business of the Year’. I wrote our submission.”

“Are you going as well?” Josie asked with surprise. There was that awkwardness again and we hadn’t even passed the 3rd floor yet.

“Well yeah, that’s why I’m bunking off. I’ve booked the afternoon off so that I’ve got plenty of time to get ready and arrive before our guests do,” I explained calmly whilst fuming inside. I’d only just left the office, for fuck’s sake! What client? When did they pull out and why the fuck hadn’t our jumped up bitch of a receptionist told me about it? It was my event to organise after all, not Shazza’s. “Did Sharon give you any more detail?”

“Only the dress code and start time.” Josie gently gnawed at her bottom lip with perfect white teeth. “Harry, about what happened at Christmas…”

“It’s not necessary, Josie,” I said holding up a hand. “It was a misunderstanding.”

The slowest lift in Christendom was about to creak past the first floor and now she wanted to talk. “I’m not…” she trailed off. “You know…”

“A raving chocoholic? Yeah you are.” I winked at her. “Look, what’s done is done. I’m happy if we can remain friends.” It was a lie but what could I do?

She looked relieved and I felt relieved we’d finally reached the ground floor. I held back and let Josie leave. One, it occurred to me that Alfie, who chauffeured her to and from work, might be waiting outside, and it probably wasn’t a good idea for him to see us emerge from the building together. And two, I had a bit of unfinished business to attend to.

“I’m just gonna go back up and see Shazza,” I explained when Josie turned round to see if I was following. “I’d better find out who’s dropped out and if there’s anything else she’s neglected to tell me.”

“Okay, I’ll see you later tonight then, Harry.” She gave me that shy smile again and left.

I waited until she was out of earshot. “Yes!” I hissed under my breath and punched the air before returning to jab at the lift buttons once again. “Come on you bastard, close!”

Quel surprise! Shazza wasn’t manning the reception desk, the job she was paid to do but seldom bothered with. When I did find her, she was sitting in my chair, at my desk, looking rapturously up at the Fat Kontroller, who in return was getting an eyeful of her lumpy tits. There really isn’t enough mind bleach in the world to purge me of that horrific mental tableaux. I resisted the impulse to retch.

“What’s this I hear, Josie’s going tonight?” I walked up and sat on my desk between the two of them.

“Ah Harry! I was just going over tonight’s guest list with Shazza,” the Fat Kontroller said, looking a little flustered. And why not? I’d just caught him ogling our fat receptionist’s cleavage. Dirty old fuck – Shaz is at least half his age.

“So who’s pulled out?” I plucked the guest list from Shazza’s hand, looked at it and put it down beside me. “And when did we know?”

“Phil Gutteridge and not that long ago,” Shazza answered defensively.

“That’s my fault, Harry,” the Fat Kontroller added. “I thought you’d gone for the day so I asked Sharon to invite Josie.”

“Okay. But why can’t he make it?” Shit! Phil is one of our more reliable clients, an absolutely corker of a guest for these sort of shindigs. He never passed up an offer of free grub and booze, and watching him eat and drink was a sight to behold, like a ravenous Serengeti lion attacking a gazelle carcass – worthy of David Attenborough narration.

“He broke his arm at the gym this morning,” the Fat Kontroller continued. “Running on the treadmill, apparently. He missed his mouth taking a big gulp of water. Slipped in the resulting puddle and down he went.”

I clamped a hand over my mouth to subdue a laugh – Phil isn’t the smallest of men, or healthiest. “Damn! I warned him about gyms. And drinking water.”

But the Fat Kontroller wasn’t finished. “I’m afraid Mrs Kontrell won’t be able to make it now either.”

“No. Is your wife poorly again?” I asked with deep concern.

“Yes, she has one of her heads on.” At least the Fat Kontroller had the decency to look embarrassed trotting out the familiar excuse. It was uncanny how often the chain smoking, soap opera addicted Mrs K pulled out of company events due to having ‘one of her heads on’. In the two and a half years I’d worked for the Fat Kontroller, I hadn’t met her once.

“So who are we going to get to replace her? A client?” I asked him. I was purposefully not including Shazza in the conversation, but now, from the corner of my eye, I caught her suddenly sitting up straighter, a simpering grin replacing the petulant pout on her face. Oh no, I thought. No, please, not Shaz!

“During Easter school holidays? No, it’s much too short notice to ask any other clients now,” the Fat Kontroller opined. “Happily young Sharon has offered to step into the breach.” He flourished his hand toward a beaming Shazza.

Oh fuck! That was all I needed, having a sneering, drunken Shazza, making sly digs at me all evening and googly eyes at the Fat Kontroller. “Are you sure there’s no one else we could ask? Tonight is kind of a big deal for F A Kontrell. What about Phil’s deputy?”

To give him credit, the Fat Kontroller did look as if he were seriously considering my suggestion, but I could tell that ship had already sailed. Still, it felt good to see Shazza’s grin falter and disappear again. She threw me a malevolent look, which I returned with raised eyebrows and condescending smile. Squirm bitch!

“No, I think we’ll stick with the revised line up,” the Fat Kontroller decided. “Although it probably won’t do us any harm to have a couple of beautiful additions on our table.” He winked at Shazza who visibly preened.

Ugh! I mentally grimaced, I fucking hope you’re referring to Josie and Shaz and not just to Shazza’s tits!

“Right. I’ll make sure not to tell Mrs K that…” If I ever get to meet her. I gave the Fat Kontroller a friendly nudge. God knows he deserved it for the mental abuse inflicted by his flirting with Shazza. As for our ambitious receptionist, I hadn’t forgiven her yet for the role she played in my Christmas beating – it was her inappropriate Secret Santa gift to me that Alfie had taken offence at.

“I’ll make up the new place cards for the table,” Shazza said, peering at the guest list on the desk. “Zander Rhodes? The fashion designer’s gonna be on our table?”

“Zandra Rhodes is a fashion designer, Shaz” I said barely able to keep the contempt out of my voice. “Zander Rhodes, however, works for Green Crusaders. They’re an environmental charity we’ve been tapping up.”

“Networking with, Harry,” the Fat Kontroller corrected me with a chuckle. “I met him at a function in the City. Nice lad, very driven. There’s some synergy there that could be mutually beneficial.”

That’s what I said – tapping up! I thought with a mental sigh. I got up to leave, “Well, alright then, if you and Shaz have got it all under control, I shall take my afternoon off now and bugger off home. See you both later.”

This time I decided to forego the extended lift experience and took the stairs.

Will the Fat Kontroller win his the prize? Does Harry pull? Will Josie allow it? And how much drink can Shazza safely handle?

*The spread… /stubs butt…*

… Find out next time. Now, ova to Cade…

*******

I apologize for all the strangeness and strange events Dear Reader. I’ve not a clue what is going on with all the self-opening doors. Next thing you know, windows will be opening entirely on their own, and entire houses may suddenly be prone to levitation. Excuse me one more moment if you please…

tumblr_n5l4ndl0dw1t9b2qeo1_500

*all kinds of unusual shit going on to be sure, but nothing really…”out of the ordinary”…per se /me scratches chin…*

Meh…I’ll see to that in a minute. But I’m confident that we’ll get, whatever this is, worked out to a logical conclusion. We may even stumble across some help and helpers along the way.

helphasalmostarrived
*no…that’s more along the lines of “professional help”, so I think their particular services are unlikely… /me looks around for anything…fishy…*

And on that note…let’s cue us up a song.

Hag With A Fag

*Afternoon, Clicky… /pats snout… What’s the Song in aid of? … /lights up… *

*Oh… /rolls eyes… Leggy is trying… /drags…*

*Eighteen credits, eh? …/flicks ash…*

Good afternoon, Dear Reader! 😀 It’s snowing again. Not as much as last time, but Thoughtful Man is out working in it…

*Hee is indeed… /blows smoke ring…*

… And I’m sat here, on Sat-‘ere-day, pondering the idea of  an anthology short story about ‘hedge riding’…

Three hedge riders in a rowThree hedge riders in a row 1

*Great mates… /puff contentedly… I’m so lucky, Clicky…*

‘Can someone be both a Hedge Rider and Hedge Witch? Yes if they are practicing crossing the veil, second sight and also find their core practice in their garden etc. If one is performing herbal magic without the Journey work, divination,
and spirit work then they are practicing Hedge Witchery and not Hedge Riding. These practices very much compliment each other. Hedge Riders use poison herbs to aid in flight, while the Hedge Witch is able to connect with the spirit world through meditations.

… And flights of fancy.

‘The Solanaceae, or nightshades, are an economically important family of flowering plants. The family ranges from annual and perennial herbs to vines, lianas, epiphytes, shrubs, and trees, and includes a number of important agricultural crops, medicinal plants, spices, weeds, and ornamentals. Many members of the family contain potent alkaloids, and some are highly toxic, but many, including tomatoes, potatoes, eggplant, bell/chili peppers, and tobacco are widely used.

Looking out the window, I see that our garden hedge is cloaked in snow…

Haw (n.)

“enclosure,” Old English haga “enclosure, fortified enclosure; hedge,” from Proto-Germanic *hag-(source also of Old Norse hagi, Old Saxon hago, German Hag “hedge;” Middle Dutch hage, Dutch haag, as in the city name The Hague), from PIE root *kagh- “to catch seize; wickerwork fence” (see hedge (n.), and compare hag). Meaning “fruit of the hawthorn bush” (Old English) is perhaps short for *hægberie.

… thinking I’m glad I don’t have to go outside to smoke in this weather. I’d hate to be made go outside to smoke today, Dear Reader. Standing on the street smoking makes me feel like a whore…

*Yikes! /final drag… That’s a different kind of hag, Clicky… /stubs butt… Nightmarish all the same. I can use that…*

Stay warm and enjoy your weekend, Dear Reader. Oh, and… Have a Song 😉

*A train of thought for a flight of fancy eh, Clicky? /pats snout… Come on, I’d better start writing it… /lights up…*

 

Across The Pond: H2O Scars

It’s the Oscars next weekend, Dear Reader, and following last year’s debacle with Bonnie and Clyde’s presentation of Best Picture…

*Yikes! /lights up…*

…I thought we’d have a look at this year’s Best Picture nominations… a Bonner and Cade presentation…

*Ooh is that Armie Hammer, Clicky? …/drags… I like him… /mischievous grin…*

… So I DMed the Okie Devil with the start of this post…

Roob and Cade Presents Best Picture Oscar 1Roob and Cade Presents Best Picture Oscar 2

‘Shenanigans (n.)

1855, of uncertain origin. Earliest records of it are in San Francisco and Sacramento, California, U.S. Suggestions include Spanish chanada, a shortened form of charranada “trick, deceit;” or, less likely, German Schenigelei, peddler’s argot for “work, craft,” or the related German slang verb schinäglen. Another guess centers on Irish sionnach “fox.”‘

… And ‘Fox’ segues nicely with the origins of this image…

2018 best picture nominations

… The list of this year’s Best Picture nominations, and their likelihood of winning the prize, as calculated by superstar statistician Nate Silver’s FiveThirtyEight…

‘The website’s logo depicts a fox, in reference to a phrase attributed to Archilochus: “The fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing.”‘

X: Woah woah woah…what’s all this now?

Cade: Roob is writing a post.

T: And?

Cade: O hi.

T: Hello.

0: Why now?

Cade: I dunno. It popped in my head earlier, there was that thing with the sink, and now…here we are.

Z: One…big…whatever this is.

Cade: I agree.

B: You mean…you concour?

Cade: Rut roh.

B: Long time no see.

Cade: And howdy to you too.

X: Let’s get back to this “Oscar’s” business. Isn’t it actually called something else?

Cade: The Academy Awards.

X: What’s this “Oscar’s” business?

Cade: I dunno. Are you talking Schindler? Or…someone else?

Z: Don’t be coy.

Cade: I’m not.

0: Get to the point…Cade.

Cade: OK, well…water seems to feature heavily within the theme(s) of this year’s Best Picture category.

X: Did you even bother to look at the Animated and/or Documentary sections?

Cade: No I did not. I glanced at the Animated, but didn’t know any of them.

Z: Your kids done all growed up…is that it?

Cade: Kinda. But I don’t know any of these films really, so the best I do is…

B: Adapt?

X: Improvise?

T: Abandon ship?

Z: Run?

0: Compromise?

Cade: Prolly.

X: We’ve not done this in a while. Are you feeling a shade…lost?

Cade: Very much so.

X: Perhaps we should keep this short then.

Cade: Likely a very good idea.

C: I’ve a question before we go. What is that mess that’s been bumping around in that thing you call a head?

Cade: Just trying to focus a bit in a different direction.

A: Commercial venture(s)?

Cade: Not really, but kinda. I can’t sell anything I don’t have to sell.

Z: By my approximation, you’ve nothing to sail.

Cade: Gonna have to go ahead and disagree with you there sparky.

Z: We’ll see.

Cade: Or not.

X: Since when is not seeing, not also…seeing?

Cade: I guess since whenever it is. We tend to equate substance with definition. Something qualify-able. Something quantifiable.

0: What’s “non-quantify-able” about darkness?

Cade: I dunno. Sounds pretty fucking well formed to me.

X: But you cannot see it.

Cade: Sure I can. Just…can’t usually see anything else.

X: I like that.

Cade: 🙂

X: …

*/drags… Ah Clicky, how could I possibly forget you, oh dolphin assistant o’ mine? …/rolls eyes… A Roob-co-Clicky-co-Cade production… /blows smoke… Better? …/pats snout…*

… Cade makes an astute observation, there is a watery theme. From the setting of ‘Dunkirk’…

… To ‘The Shape of Water’…

… ‘Ladybird‘ and…

*Cool find, Clicky! …/flicks ash…*

… Knot to mention ‘Ebbing‘. And even last year’s winner, ‘Moonlight’ is an influence. Kinda…

Roob and Cade Presents Best Picture Oscar 3Roob and Cade Presents Best Picture Oscar 4

*/:O… Yikes!*

*/shakes head… Tacky, Clicky… /final drag… Very tacky…*

*Oh sorry, I misconstrued…the moon affects tides whether it’s the brightest or Darkest Hour… /stubs butt… Come on… /stretches… It’s getting late, Clicky. Let’s finish up and Get Out of hear…*

Sew… That’s the Bonner and Cade Best Picture presentation for 2018 for the LoL. As for who’ll actually win the Oscar? Like the statistician boffins at FiveThirtyEight…

‘We have no clue.’

Dear Reader… Have a Song 😉

*/squints… Mary J Bilge, Clicky? Come on. Bed… /pats snout…*

*******

Updated: Cade, the Okie Devil of Text US has written an accompanying post 😀

*Mmm… Yummy! …/drools…*